Till we meet again

7 November 2018, 1:41pm, Sunny.

Chocolate passed away peacefully in my arms.  It was a hard goodbye.

Our English Cocker Spaniel, Chocolate, lived passionately and courageously for 13 hearty years.  She lived a charmed life.  She was with us from the time we were 25 to our now 38-years-old selves.  We were inseparable. 

I can still hear the sound of her claws on our marbled floor, it was like a tap dance routine, how i missed them.  I can still see her being panicky about the thunderstorms, pacing tirelessly and pawing us relentlessly.  I also remember how i comfort her.

She understood what we couldn't and somehow took on the role of a best friend, a loving companion, a daughter, all within one beating heart.

The loss of a beloved pet is a strange feeling, united by an overall yearn for peace and a massive entanglement of grief.  Tissues become the plaster we need, yet the wonderful memories fill in all the blocks of pain and suffering.  It is a pattern of good and bad news, feeling intensely grateful and also immensely, fiercely bereaved. 

It's hard to come home knowing she won't be there anymore, but we also have a sense that there's a bit of her within ourselves, in her memory at the same time.  Her zealous spirit is captured in the heart of every human who met her and we are lucky to be a part of her life.  How could we not think to ourselves, "what a wonderful dog".

Forever is a long time, but we wouldn't mind spending it by your side.

Good-bye, our old old girl.  Till we meet again.